


The Dead Paragon Sketch

by gardnerhill



Category: Lord of the Rings (Movies), Monty Python's Flying Circus
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-10
Updated: 2012-12-10
Packaged: 2017-11-20 18:53:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/588565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gardnerhill/pseuds/gardnerhill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tonight, the role of Aragorn son of Arathorn will be played by John Cleese.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Dead Paragon Sketch

Aragorn strode into the Great Hall of Minas Tirith, smoking with anger. "Hello! I wish to complain about this Man you sent to Rivendell!"

Denethor beamed. "Oh yes, Boromir! Very popular, good with a sword! What's wrong with him?"

"I'll tell you what's wrong with him, mate." Aragorn dropped the arrow-riddled corpse before the Steward's Seat. "He's dead, that's what's wrong with him."

Denethor stared. "Nah, he's _stunned_. Gondorian Stewards stun easily. Lovely armour."

"The armour don't enter into it! He's bleeding demised!"

"Nah, he's pining for the White Tower."

"He's full of Orc arrows!"

"Well, Gondorian Stewards _prefer_ being full of Orc arrows!"

Aragorn shouted, "Listen, mate! This Man is _no more_. He is _deceased_! He has _ceased to be_! If we hadn't popped him into a boat and sent him down river, he'd be _pushing up the simbelmynë_! He's _sailed into the West_ , _taken the Gift of Iluvatar_ and now _lies in Mandos' Halls of Bleeding Waiting!_ This! Is an _Ex-Steward_!"

Silence. "Right, then, I'd best get you another one shall I?" Denethor beckoned to Faramir.

Aragorn rolled his eyes. "You have to set people on fire and throw them off cliffs to get anything done around here."

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for the LOTR LJ comm ToilandDrouble, for the prompt asking for either a Monty Python or Goon Show reference.


End file.
